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TEST: Loosely translated from the greek, TGP means "So What?"
This test is based on how cool you were in high school. What crowd you ran
with, etc. It is pretty accurate. You may want to send it to your friends to
see if they have changed. If you get to the questions screen - they will
surely bring back some memories.
2 - Use computers to look busy.
Any time you use a computer, it looks like "work" to the casual observer. You can send and receive personal e-mail, chat, and generally have a blast without doing anything remotely related to work. These aren't exactly the societal benefits that the proponents of the computer revolution would like to talk about but they're not bad either. When you get caught by your boss -- and you will get caught -- your best defence is to claim you're teaching yourself to use new software, thus saving valuable training dollars.
3 - Keep a messy desk.
Top management can get away with a clean desk. For the rest of us, it looks like we're not working hard enough. Build huge piles of documents around your workspace. To the observer, last year's work looks the same as today's work; it's volume that counts. Pile them high and wide. If you know somebody is coming to your cubicle, bury the document you'll need halfway down in an existing stack and rummage for it when he/she arrives.
4 - Use voice mail.
Never answer your phone if you have voice mail. People don't call you just because they want to give you something for nothing -- they call because they want you to do work for them. That's no way to live. Screen all your calls through voice mail. If somebody leaves a voice-mail message for you and it sounds like impending work, respond during lunch hour when you know they're not there -- it looks like you're hardworking and conscientious even though you're being a devious weasel.
5 - Look impatient & annoyed.
One should also always try to look impatient and annoyed to give your bosses the impression that you are always busy.
6 - Leave the office late.
Always leave the office late, especially when the boss is still around. You could read magazines and storybooks that you always wanted to read but have no time until late before leaving. Make sure you walk past the boss' room on your way out. Send important e-mail at unearthly hours (e.g. 9:35 p.m., 7:05 a.m., etc.) and during public holidays.
7 - Use sighing for effect.
Sigh loudly when there are many people around, giving the impression that you are under extreme pressure.
8 - Opt for the stacking strategy.
It is not enough to pile lots of documents on the table. Put lots of books on the floor etc. (thick computer manuals are the best).
9 - Build your vocabulary.
Read up on some computer magazines and pick out all the jargon and new products. Use the phrases freely when in conversation with bosses. Remember; they don't have to understand what you say, but you sure sound impressive.
10 - Don't get caught.
MOST IMPORTANT: Don't forward this page's URL to your boss by mistake!
2 - Use computers to look busy.
Any time you use a computer, it looks like "work" to the casual observer. You can send and receive personal e-mail, chat, and generally have a blast without doing anything remotely related to work. These aren't exactly the societal benefits that the proponents of the computer revolution would like to talk about but they're not bad either. When you get caught by your boss -- and you will get caught -- your best defence is to claim you're teaching yourself to use new software, thus saving valuable training dollars.
3 - Keep a messy desk.
Top management can get away with a clean desk. For the rest of us, it looks like we're not working hard enough. Build huge piles of documents around your workspace. To the observer, last year's work looks the same as today's work; it's volume that counts. Pile them high and wide. If you know somebody is coming to your cubicle, bury the document you'll need halfway down in an existing stack and rummage for it when he/she arrives.
4 - Use voice mail.
Never answer your phone if you have voice mail. People don't call you just because they want to give you something for nothing -- they call because they want you to do work for them. That's no way to live. Screen all your calls through voice mail. If somebody leaves a voice-mail message for you and it sounds like impending work, respond during lunch hour when you know they're not there -- it looks like you're hardworking and conscientious even though you're being a devious weasel.
5 - Look impatient & annoyed.
One should also always try to look impatient and annoyed to give your bosses the impression that you are always busy.
6 - Leave the office late.
Always leave the office late, especially when the boss is still around. You could read magazines and storybooks that you always wanted to read but have no time until late before leaving. Make sure you walk past the boss' room on your way out. Send important e-mail at unearthly hours (e.g. 9:35 p.m., 7:05 a.m., etc.) and during public holidays.
7 - Use sighing for effect.
Sigh loudly when there are many people around, giving the impression that you are under extreme pressure.
8 - Opt for the stacking strategy.
It is not enough to pile lots of documents on the table. Put lots of books on the floor etc. (thick computer manuals are the best).
9 - Build your vocabulary.
Read up on some computer magazines and pick out all the jargon and new products. Use the phrases freely when in conversation with bosses. Remember; they don't have to understand what you say, but you sure sound impressive.
10 - Don't get caught.
MOST IMPORTANT: Don't forward this page's URL to your boss by mistake!
If you remember a few months back, I had a post titled There’s a baby in the house when baby Deacon (and mommy) came to visit the King casa. Well, guess who’s back? Yep, you guessed it! The only guest blogger ever to post content (although it was gibberish – much like most of my postings) on Tis Gar Plen. Mommy and Deacon decided to grace us with their presence this week, allowing us to host them in their ‘vacation’ in Oklahoma.
This is the third picture of Deacon on my blog, the first being in the New Baby Announcement and the second in the June post referenced above. As mentioned in June, this kid is all muscle, and I’m not talking table muscle. While he doesn’t have the balance to walk yet, this youngster was pulling up to the standing position several weeks ago and is wanting to start running all over the house.I found out after they had left for the airport that I had missed a very moving piano recital performed by Deacon earlier in the week. I wish I had known he was such a virtuoso, as I would have asked him to play a tune or two for me.
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JAY, Okla. - Sheriff's deputies have arrested a Grove man on drug charges after finding crystal methamphetamine inside his prosthetic leg. Larry Clinton Harper, 64, was arrested at his business, Harper's Used Cars and Body Shop, last week.My first two thoughts when I read this report:
During a search, deputies found drugs inside a sock-like covering inside Harper's prosthetic leg, said Delaware County Sheriff's Capt. Larry Barnett.
"They just tumbled out, and he just laughed," Barnett said. "He said he thought he was pulling the wool over our eyes, but we had the last laugh."
The arrest followed successful drug buys from Harper's business, Barnett said.
Two weeks from today is one of the major "daddy-daughter dates" of 2006! Sarah and I will be taking a road trip to Enid to help out with an 89.7 The House (radio station) concert featuring BarlowGirl. This will be the third BarlowGirl concert Sarah and I would have attended in the past couple of years. Sarah normally helps out as a volunteer with World Vision type of tables. I, on the other hand, work security for the artists, so this will be third time I have got to hang out with the Barlow sisters and their parents.
I am awful with song lyrics, unless I have the chance to read the lyrics as I listen to the song the first several times. Since I like to put together websites, I took a few minutes to put together a "BarlowGirl Lyrics" site at http://manna4all.net/bg-lyrics. Take a peek at it if you like, and even listen to some of the sample clips I found at BarlowGirl website.
14 days and counting........
A man walks into a pet store and says, "I'm playing Long John Silver in the play Treasure Island, and I'm looking for a parrot. Can you sell me one?"
The pet store owner says, "You don't want a real parrot, it'll squawk all the time and poop on your shoulder, and what if it falls off during the play?"
The man says, "Well, I want to be as realistic as possible."
The pet store owner says, "I've got a stuffed parrot you can use. Can you pick it up on Thursday?"
"Oh, I can't come on Thursday. That's when I'm getting my leg cut off."
Let's say I break into your house. Let's say that when you discover me in your house, you insist that I leave. But I say, "I've made all the beds and washed the dishes and did the laundry and swept the floors; I've done all the things you don't like to do. I'm hard-working and honest (except for when I broke into your house).Why can't people see how ridiculous this is?! Only in America....
According to the protesters, not only must you let me stay, you must add me to your family's insurance plan, educate my kids, and provide other benefits to me and to my family (my husband will do your yard work because he too is hard-working and honest, except for that breaking in part).
If you try to call the police or force me out, I will call my friends who will picket your house carrying signs that proclaim my right to be there. It's only fair, after all, because you have a nicer house than I do, and I'm just trying to better myself. I'm hard-working and honest, um, except for well, you know.
And what a deal it is for me!! I live in your house, contributing only a fraction of the cost of my keep, and there is nothing you can do about it without being accused of selfishness, prejudice and being an anti-housebreaker.
Oh yeah, and I want you to learn my language so you can communicate with me!!